Saturday, February 3, 2018

Do You Feel Like a Failure?

Do you think you are stupid? Dumb? You just feel like a failure and you can't do anything right?

Perhaps you've had a victory over something, but then something else sets you back 3-steps. You mumble a few choice words, throw the hammer, slam a few things and shout, "That figures! Nothing ever works for me." It seems like no matter what you do, you can't get out of your own way. Like, it never was funny, but now it really isn't funny.

Well, maybe you've never struggled with that, but I certainly have. For me it seems when I finally have a victory over something, it's countered with opposition that leaves me feeling like a failure, dumb, stupid, or incapable, to name a few. I finally started asking myself, "Where did you get that idea from, Tammy Sue?" Well, duh! Growing up with an angry father who often yelled is a good start. Dad had major health issues and we struggled financially and mom was emotionally absent.

Okay, so how does that make me feel like a failure. Well, my environment bred uncertainty and fear rather than edifying and encouragement and creativity. Over time I learned that it was better to keep my mouth shut and not ask questions. Although my mother would probably disagree because she says I was born into this world talking. But what's funny, although not, is in school I always felt very shy, fat, ugly and invisible. 

Thursday, December 7, 2017

The Measure of a Man

Parkinson’s took my uncle November 28, 2017, but he fought it for twenty years because he refused to stop living life. After my husband Curtis played guitar and sang, Amazing Grace My Chains Are Gone, I was one of many privileged to share some words at his Celebration of Life December 2, 2017. I’d like to share my tribute.
Uncle Joe was my favorite uncle. Naturally that made me his favorite niece. And I knew I was his favorite niece because he would twinkle when my aunt announced, “Your favorite niece is here.” But then my sister would walk in the room and my aunt announced, “Your other favorite niece is here.” Cyndi Jo and I would laugh because the gig was up. Over the years it had become a game to try and win the favorite-niece-award but the truth is Uncle Joe has three nieces. He would never show favoritism because he loved us all for who we were. That’s the kind of man he was. 
So my question is how do you measure a man?

Tuesday, August 8, 2017

What Would My Lucille Say?

Mr. Ernest Gismondi met Lucille. They fell in love and married. She kept the home fires going while Mr. Gismondi served in the Army Air Corps as a pilot flying B17's during World War II. Following the war, he became a test engineer for United Technologies in Bridgeport and Stratford while he and his wife settled in the 1950s and raised their children in Newtown, Connecticut.
I met Mr. and Mrs. G., that's what I called them, when I was 15 because their son was my high school sweetheart. We'd get off the school bus near their neighbors and walk the worn path through the trees that bordered their back yards. We'd come up the back cement porch steps to enter the house. For as along as I've known this family, I didn't realize they had a front door until I was an adult. Everyone came in through the back. On the small porch, making my way to the door, I passed the little blue bench that had a basket filled with Mr. G's Yukon gold potatoes from his annual garden. Nailed up next to the door was Mrs. G's cloth bag filled with clothes pins. Monday was always laundry day. Outside the back door I wiped my feet on patches of old carpet where Mr. G's worn out garden boots sat. After school, we would be greeted with warm apple pie or peach pie or the absolute to die for, Father Sarducci cheesecake. Friday nights was one of my favorite meals at their home, homemade potato fries in the deep black cast iron frying pan along with steak.

Friday, August 4, 2017

Wounded Song is on Amazon!

SCROLL BELOW to see links for Amazon & Createspace eStore.

Hi everyone! As some of you know I have been working on a non-book that became a book. It is now Published!
please visit my new website: to leave comments about the book (if you've read it).

my book

Wounded Song

is now available on Amazon and Createspace eStore!



BOOK LAUNCH: if you attend, there will be a limited supply of books available at the book launch. 

BOOK PRICE: $15.00 (cash only)

Book Launch August 18, 2017

Always, always and always I'm am grateful for the encouraging feedback I've received over the years that helped me to believe that my story mattered!